Dear Pastors and Youth Pastors

• 2 out of 5 Teenage girls get pregnant
• Within the Hispanic population: 3 out of 5 Teenage girls get pregnant
• The Center for Disease Control reports that 47.8% of students have had sexual intercourse

Shocked? No? Check this out

• Teen childbearing costs the state of Texas approximately 1 billion dollars a year

• Nationally teen childbearing costs taxpayers at least 9.1 billion dollars a year (and we wonder why there isn’t enough federal money to help our kids go to college)

If those numbers still did not shock you, think of the lives of our teens

• The majority of teen mothers and children live in poverty
• Less then half of all teen moms DO NOT finish high school
• 8 out of 10 teen fathers DO NOT marry their baby’s mother (think of how many of our teens have said, “I love him and we’ll be together forever”)

Unfortunately, many people who read these statistics will still not be shocked. For many families, schools, and churches, this tragedy of teen sex and teen pregnancy has become a normal part of life. The bar of expectations for our students has lowered over the years. Where we use to dream of our children becoming doctors, lawyers, and teachers, we now just pray for them to “at least” finish high school before they get pregnant.

If there was one phrase in the English language that I wish I could erase, it would be the phrase “at least.”

- “well, he may not be passing, but at least he’s in school”

- “he may not be a very good kid, but at least he’s not in jail”

- “she had a baby at 15, but at least she is finishing high school”

If we expect the very least from our kids, that is what they are going to give us.

What is wrong with having higher expectations for our kids? The Lord says in the book of John that He came to give us life and life to the fullest! Life Abundantly! In Jeremiah He promises us plans to prosper us and give us a hope and a future. Our teens need to know that God has great plans for their life, but if they decide to become sexually active, they are putting those plans in jeopardy. We know that God can work in any circumstance and in anyone’s life, but it is clear in 1 Thessalonians 4:3, “God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.”

So as a church, how do we effectively reach our teens and help them to remain abstinent until marriage, thus avoiding the negative consequences that accompany teen sex?

We need to have good, open communication with our kids

Some people still have a difficult time hearing the word “sex” mentioned in church. But we need to find a proper way to give our kids appropriate, biblical knowledge on the subject of sex. We need to let them know what God’s plan for a sexual relationship is and why it is important to keep that relationship within the HOLY bonds of marriage.

We need to give our students resources and tools to help them say NO

It’s not enough for us to say, “God says not to have sex until marriage.” All of our children are receiving messages from movies, music, internet, friends, and sometimes even school teachers that is completely opposite of God’s word. They need help to fight against these messages. They need lessons they can apply to real life situations. They need guidance and examples of what a healthy relationship looks like. And, they need tips on how to have holy dating relationships.

We need to empower parents

I have been working as an abstinence educator for over 8 years. I have had the opportunity to speak to many people on this subject. However, to this very day, my parents have never told me where babies come from. I never had “the talk” with my dad. I think many parents are afraid to talk to their kids about sex. For so long, this subject was seen as inappropriate and embarrassing. So, many parents, like mine, happily signed the permission slip for their kids to learn about sex from their school. But, as many of you know, our schools are not doing an appropriate job in instilling morals, healthy choices, and the idea of choosing abstinence as the healthiest choice for your life into our kids. The world is filling the minds of our teens with ideas that go against God’s plan for sex. It is time that parents take back the responsibility of teaching their children about sex, and boldly and appropriately let them know that God created sex for our enjoyment within a holy and sanctified marriage.

MAKE A DIFFERENCE

If you and your church want to make an impact in the lives of teens, you want your kids to make a commitment to abstain from sex until marriage, and you want to improve communication between kids and their parents, then I want to help. Go to http://www.davidnatividad/ and check out the workshop “Raising the Bar of Expectations." If you would like to bring this workshop to your church, or if you have any questions, please contact me

David Natividad

david@yourswbc.com

Mom and Dad

Tomorrow I will be taking my parents out to celebrate their 45th wedding anniversary.

45 YEARS!!!! How cool is that?

Now, I've been around for 32 years, so I've seen my parents live their life as husband and wife. Is it a perfect marriage? NO! But, there is no such thing. Since a marriage is made up of two people, and since no person is perfect, then a marriage cannot be. But that's ok. I think it is the imperfections that make it most personal.

If there is one thing I can tell you I've learned from my mom and dad (there are A LOT of things, but they won't all fit on this blog) its what true love is in a marriage. I wish I could tell you that my dad is the most romantic man in the world, or that my mom is the kind of woman who appreciates romance, flowers, jewelry, and candy. But I've never really seen them that way. They are an old school Hispanic couple who rarely show their romantic side. I'm sure they have had their romantic moments. I can think back on some times when my dad would say sweet things about my mom, or embarrass her by kissing her in public.. haha

But when I think of their marriage, romance is not the first thing that comes to mind. Now, I have made a promise that when I get married I will try my hardest to always be romantic. I hope that flowers, cards, and gifts will always be a part of my wife's life. But I also know that a marriage is not built on romantic love. It is built on TRUE, REAL love. When times are bad, or when someone is upset, it's not romantic love that helps to solve the problem... it's true love. It is commitment. It is hard work. My mom and dad are HARD workers. I've only met a few other people in my life that have similar work ethic as my mom and dad. If it's their job, if it's their kids, or if it's their marriage... they work hard to make it happen.

I praise God that I never had to worry about not having a place to live, food to eat, or having clothes on my back. My parents worked hard to provide for their family. I was also very lucky that in high school, I could focus completely on school, sports, band, student government, one act play, etc... because my mom and dad worked so hard so their kids wouldn't have to have a job to help support the family. And the best thing in my life was that as a kid, and as a teenager, and now as an adult, I never had to worry about my parents ever getting a divorce. My parents worked hard to make sure their marriage worked. They were committed. FOR LIFE! They supported each other. They worked together to raise their children.

I feel so bad for children who have to ask, "why isn't daddy coming home." I couldn't imagine what that would be like. I grew up in a happy home.

I know that a single parent can still provide a happy home. But, I couldn't imagine living without both a mom and a dad at home... showing me an example of what commitment is. An example of how to care for someone else. An example of how to be faithful. Two people who truly meant, "till death do us part." They taught me the importance of faith.

The reason my mom and dad have such a strong marriage is because they are both servants of Jesus Christ. God is the center of our family. If it was up to my mom and dad on their own, then there is a big chance that they would be just another statistic in the divorce category. But because of our savior and His great wisdom, we are celebrating a great day tomorrow. 45 years of marriage. I guess that might be rare this day and age.... But it's something I knew we would one day celebrate.

Mi Familia Pt. 3

(Mi Familia Pt 1 and Pt 2 can be found at myspace.com/davidnatividad)

I became a Christian at the age of 9. My mom and dad encouraged me to do well in school, music, and sports. For many years I was surrounded by friends who all wanted to do well in life. These are all reasons that I have found some success in my life (success not measured by money or status, but by looking for the purposes God has for my life). But also, I've always had this inner desire... this gut feeling that pushed me to always want more.

Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men."

I've always believed that as Christians, we are called to do things with a holy and higher expectation. I truly believe that Christians should be at the top of their class, they should be known as the hardest working athlete on their team, and the best worker at their job. We do these things not because we have a big ego, but because we give our best to the Lord. We worship Him in everything we do. If I'm getting an "A" in math, or if I'm scoring a touchdown, Colossians says that I do it for the honor and glory of God... no one else. Now, automatically, when we do this for the Lord, others benefit from it.

I think that if there is anything that I could pray for all of my cousins, I would pray that they have the inner desire to do all things as if working for the Lord. I pray they have the inner desire to improve themselves through education and hard work. I want them to know that even though there is nothing wrong with working at lower paying jobs, there is also NOTHING wrong with wanting to do more with your life. Raise the Bar of expectations. What is stopping you from becoming a Doctor or a Lawyer. What is keeping you from getting a Bachelor's, Masters, Or PhD? NOTHING!

Philippians 4:13 says, "For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength"

WHAT IS STOPPING YOU?

Let's be honest.... Will alcohol be around 20 years from now? YES.. it was here before you were born and it will be here long after you are dead and gone. Will drugs be around 20 years from now? YES... again, people were smoking weed long before you were born, and unfortunately it will still be here long after you are dead and gone. Please don't thing you are doing anything special by smoking weed... There will always be dirty little clubs, and dark little bars open late at night. They've been here, and they will always be here.

But you know what won't be here 20 years from now? The opportunities you have right now!! Your chance to do good in school... your chance to go back to school... you chance to turn over everything to God and to say, "Lord, I need you. I can do all things only through you." Why are you focused so much on things that have no meaning and will be here forever? It makes me want to cry every time I see young people put so much importance on a "party life." I promise I'm going to yell at the top of my lungs the next time I see one of my little cousins put "I love to drink and party" on their myspace profile!! WHY? WHY? WHY??????

We are not promised tomorrow! You can't say, "I'll have fun now, but one day I'll get serious about God, or my education, or my career." Maybe "one day" may not get here. And when you leave this planet do you want to be known as a person who did incredible things with their life, or as someone who really knew how to "party." You want to be known as a "party animal?" All you are doing is joining the millions of other fools who think that is important. Any idiot can be known as someone who can drink a beer or smoke some weed. Our schools are full of them. But to be a person who stands out. A person who allows God to move in their life... to make an impact in their generation... to be known as someone who helped others, achieved greatness, and did something others couldn't do. That is what God wants to do with you.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

God has an incredible plan for your life. And I guarantee you it has nothing to do with impressing the local fools on how hard you can party. God has called you for greater and mightier things.

In Him,

D.

Item one.. Let's Pray

Yesterday was my first day of my new schedule at SW Baptist Church. Since this is my first staff position at a church I'm not sure how things will be different from my other jobs. I mean, when I was growing up, the churches I attended didn't have staff. I went to small churches that had bi-vocational pastors. So, any type of meetings that had to do with church business came in the form of the "sesion de negocios," or "church business meeting." Now, if anyone reading this was raised in a traditional Hispanic Southern Baptist Church then you know why I was nervous when Pastor Mike, Pastor of SW Baptist Church, called a staff meeting for Monday morning. Old school church business meetings are infamous for being cut throat.

But as Pastor Mike started talking during our meeting, I felt like I was back at my non-profit office planning the weeks activities. We were breaking down Sunday's service and asking ourselves what we can do to better serve the members. We talked about future plans and about what I need to do to research the probabilities of our church pursuing certain projects. It was a great meeting and I felt like I was right back in my element doing the things I know how to do. You see, I had no idea what to expect. I was nervous. I didn't know if my skills running a non-profit would help me in the church. I know a church technically is a non-profit, but I've been working in non-profits for a long time and I've been going to church for a LONG time. I never saw the two being run the same way.

I think one advantage for SW Baptist is that Pastor Mike has a great business background. He runs his meetings like a business. We are talking about project points, creating action plans, assigning deadlines, and delegating assignments to other leaders.

But even though he runs his meetings like a business, there was one meeting objective that was completely different. You see, in this meeting there were several points that we had to cover. The first point was PRAYER! And I don't just mean, "hey let's pray to start our meeting..." I mean our first and most important point of the meeting was to pray. We went over prayer requests and we prayed. We didn't pray for our meeting, we prayed for the church, the people, and for each other. So many times, even in the church, we don't' recognize the importance of prayer. As someone who has been a part of praise teams and other ministries, I always treated prayer as just a ritualistic thing we did before each practice or before each meeting. Prayer was never an important part of practice or the meeting. We never said, "hey, during the first 30 minutes of practice all we are going to do is pray. Pray for each other and this ministry." Sometimes we're so lazy getting to the church on time that we don't have adequate time to practice or meet, much less lay aside time to pray.

I know this is not anything very deep, and it probably didn't make anyone of you stop and say, "wow, I never thought of that." I guess I was just happy to see that prayer wasn't something we did just to start our meeting, Prayer was a part of the meeting. And, it was the thing we spent the most time on. I guess all I can hope for is that of any of you are dreading your next business meeting at church, maybe you can make prayer a major part of that meeting.

Item number one on the agenda.... Let's Pray.

A Brand New Day

I think I'm finally back into my routine of waking up at 6 AM. Since I stopped working for the school disctrict, I started sleeping in a little later every day. That needed to be stopped quick, or in the words of one of my heros Barney Fife, "Nip it in the Bud." I couldn't get back into that bad habit.

Today I was up by 6 and I was at the Medical Center track by 6:30. It felt great walking in such beautiful morning weather. I had my head phones on and I was jamming out to David Crowder. This HAS to be my new routine.

I do not like the idea of making resolutions, or saying that from this day forward I promise to do something. I think that has always been my problem. In my mind I have always figured out what I need to do, but that is where it always stays... in my mind. In my mind I can plan out my whole day, work schedule, work out schedule, and social calendar. Now don't get me wrong, it is great to schedule things and plan out events, but after so many years of thinking I'm going to change my ways, it was a HUGE step for me to actually do it this morning.

This reminds me of what the book of James says in chapter 1:22-24 - "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like."

I hope my physical life is just a small example or symbol of my Spirtual life. My prayer is that I am known as someone who not only has faith in God, but shows that faith by serving others. I know that if I truly put action to my faith and not just think about doing good things for the Lord, this lifestyle will find its way into other areas of my life. If I become a man who doesn't just think about ways I can live out my faith, but actually LIVE my faith, then I know God will show me how to implement this in my physical life and relationships.

I want to be a husband one day who not only tells my wife I will make time for her or do special things for her.... I want to be the husband who WILL do those things. I don't want to make promises to my children that I will spend time with them, but then never do. I want everything that God puts in my mind to do to become a reality.

Please pray for me becuase I feel God has put some incredible plans in my mind. I believe He will provide everything I need to make these happen. Pray that I become the kind of man that will not only think on these things but DO these things.

Follow The Plan

I overslept today. I told myself I was going to get up early and I was going to head over to Medical Center and take a few laps around the track.... yeah, didn't happen.
If you know me, then you know I've been struggling with my weight. What you may not know, however, is that even though I have a weight problem I am actually very healthy. I went to the doctor about 2 weeks ago and had a full physical and checkup. I had all my blood work done becuase the Doctor was convinced that I had to have high cholesterol and diabetes. She was surprised to see that everything came back normal. She said to lose weight I needed to start being more active. I guess she figured I spent most of my time on the couch eating cheetos and watching TV. But the truth is, I am very active. I work out daily. I swim, I'm into boxing, and I love to lift weights. Back in April I even hired a personal trainer to help me lose weight.

Then WHY are you still overweight?? This is the question my doctor had, my family has, and unfortunately, a question that I know the answer to, but have done nothing to fix.

You see, I love working out. When my trianer is making me run, swim, or putting me through any other exercise, it may hurt a little, but it is something I'm use to. I was very blessed to play sports all my life, so working out is second nature. BUT, you see, working out is just a small part of losing weight. The biggest part is your diet.

I was raised in a Mexican household, so we fried everything. And my mom didn't use extra virgin olive oil in the skillet. She, like many other Mexican moms, used MANTECA from that big green tub you find at the bottom shelf at the grocery store. LARD.. FAT.. and we fried everthing with that. We even fried our beans. We love frying so much, we RE-fry our beans. I have 30 years of bad eating habits that I am trying to break, but it is so hard.

My trainer has put together a great nutrition plan for me. But I know, that if I don't follow that plan, I'm not going to see results. This is an issue I have prayed about, and I know the Lord has answered my prayers. I have prayed, "Lord, please help me to be healthy.. please help me lose weight." And he has. He has given me the finances to join a gym and hire a trainer. He has given me all the health information I need to know about obesity. He has put a trainer in my life who has laid out a great plan for me. God has said, "David, here it is. It's all laid out in front of you." But, if I refuse to follow it, then I will not lose weight. God has answered my prayers, but I refuse to accept his Blessings. I refuse to follow the plan.

HOW CRAZY IS THAT?

I think I have done this several times in my life. Not just with a weight problem, but with all issues in my life. God has laid out great plans for all of us. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Through His word and guidance, God has shown us so many wonderful plans to bless us. But if we refuse to follow that plan, we will not see results in our lives. So many people are so unhappy in church, or they feel like nothing is happening in their Spiritual lives. They feel far from God, and worship is not real in their lives. They know they are supposed to follow God, but they refuse to follow His plan. They return to all of their bad habits. They don't get rid of them.

We need to give those bad habits to God, allow Him to take them away, and then we need to follow His plan for our lives.

Pray for me. Pray that I can get rid of my bad eating habits and start following the healthy nutrition plan placed in front of me.

And pray for me and everyone you know. Pray that in our spritual lives, we will recognize God's plan for our lives. That we willnot return to our bad habits, but we will turn to God and recieve his Blessings. He is ready to pour them upon us. I think many times, we just refuse to accept them. Crazy...

My Tio Andy Ybarra

This is a blog post that I had on Myspace. I wrote it on March 14, 2008

My Tio Andy Ybarra

First, I want to thank you for all of the love and support you guys have given me through all of your prayers. As soon as I heard my uncle was sick, I jumped on myspace and asked everyone I knew to pray for him. He was a complete stranger to some of you, but your love for God and His people led you to lift him up in prayer. For that, I am forever grateful.

I have already spoken to a lot of you, but in case I haven’t had a chance to let you know, my uncle is now with the Lord.

When someone passes away, everyone starts to remember all of the good times they had with their loved one. Normally, you forget all the bad things and only think of the good. But in the case of my uncle, there were no bad things to forget. Every memory I have of him is good. You've heard plenty of people call their deceased fathers, uncles, and friends "good men," and out of sympathy you will agree with them, even if it’s not completely true. But in the case of Andy Ybarra Sr., there isn’t one person who can disagree when you say he truly was a GOOD MAN. This man had no enemies. And by the way he lived his life, you can see why.

Andy Ybarra Sr. was a quiet, humble man. He was a man who’s actions spoke for themselves. You would see him in his room, down on his knees praying for his family. He would walk into the house quietly after a hard days work, again, work he did for his family. Whenever a favor was asked of him (especially at Camp Menard) he would get up to help, without hesitation. He was honest and he was faithful. He was faithful to God, his wife, his children, his mother, his nieces and nephews, his Grandchildren, and of course, to his Dallas Cowboys.

This is the kind of man I want in my corner. He was faithful to his Cowboys no matter what. He wore their T-shirts and the caps. Through out his house you would find posters, pictures, and so many other items representing the Blue and Silver of the Cowboys. It didn’t matter if they were winning super bowls or if they were losing every game... he was faithful. This is the kind of man he was. And he wasn’t just this way with his Cowboys. This is the way he lived his life. It didn’t matter what you did, or how bad of a person you were, my Tio Andy was never going to say one negative thing about you.

My cousin, Andy Jr., told us of a story that pretty much sums up the Man my Tio was. Andy Jr. talked about watching sport center with his dad, and of course there was always a story of a professional athlete who was in trouble for drugs, or alcohol, or some other scandal. Sports center would mention how this athlete was sentenced to go to rehab, or to see a counselor. Andy Jr. says his dad would say, "that man doesn’t need rehab, he needs Jesus. I’m going to pray for him." After a few days, Andy Jr. went to his dad’s house as he always did, and he found his dad in his bedroom praying, which was something that always happened. He could hear his dad praying for his family, and for friends, and for the troops in war. Then, he would hear him pray for the athlete he heard about on ESPN a few days ago. He prayed for this mans salvation and for him to be healthy.

I am ashamed to say that there have been times in my life that I have said, "I’ll pray for you," or "I’ll be sure to keep that person in my prayers," only to forget about it by the next day. There have been times that I have passionately proclaimed the gospel on stage with a loud voice, only to forget how important my quiet time is. That time where I sit alone, talk to God, and listen to what he has to say to me.

My uncle was a quiet man. You never heard him on stage, or behind a pulpit speaking to a large crowd with a loud voice. But I know for a fact, that this man did more for the kingdom of God than most will ever do. If you had the pleasure of being in Andy Ybarra Sr’s family or circle of friends, than you can be confident that you had someone praying for you. You had a man in your life that lifted you up in prayer on a daily basis.

I’ve been blessed the last few years to travel across TX to speak to thousands of young people in schools, churches, and events. I’ve talked about making right choices, and I’ve shared the Gospel of Jesus. But as I sit here now and look back on the life of my uncle, I realize that my few years of ministry experience do not even hold a candle to my Tio Andy’s ministry. I think of how faithful he was day after day, year after year, on his knees praying for us. And as Andy Jr. told us at his dad’s funeral, even after his knees got so bad where he couldn’t kneel anymore, you would still find him on the edge of his bed, head bowed down, praying.

So, I now ask you all, family and friends, to be like my uncle. Continue praying for his Wife. Continue praying for his children and grand children. You know, when I found out that my Tio was sick, I wasn’t scared for him. As much as I was sad, and as much as it hurt to think of him in any pain, I wasn’t scared for him. I knew his salvation was secure. I knew that Jesus was his close personal friend. He talked to him every day. But I was scared for my family. I didnt’ know how they would respond to such a huge loss. So, please keep them in prayer. Help everyone find the peace and understanding that only God can give.

And finally, realize that God has a HUGE purpose for your life. My uncle was used by God in a marvelous way. He was a prayer warrior and he was a true example of a man of God. God wants to use you too. Surrender your life to Him. Let him use you in a marvelous way. It was only because Jesus was alive in my Uncle’s life that we can stand here today and say with complete honesty, this man made no enemies, had no enemies, and was loved by everyone who met him. What will people say about your life?